Love, Lucy

A little throwback to my trip to Italia! Usually when I go on a trip to a famous country or city I search for a book that has a plot in that country or city. So my search for a book in Italy began and I found the perfect book: Love and Gelato. It wasn't published until April so I thought, okay things will be on time I don't leave until the end of April... But the book was postponed to May! I had to find another book in Italy and then found this one: Love, Lucy by April Lindner.

Lucy is backpacking through Europe together with a friend. Their last stop? The big Italy! Even though Lucy is liking the trip, she had to give up her true passion to go there. And all this because of her dad who didn't agree with her passions. Going on with her trip Lucy falls in love with cities but falls even harder for Florence. Not only because of the maleficent sights but also because of one person. As the trip comes to an end, Lucy is confused with what she wants and which desires she feels like fulfilling. Will she ever see him again? Will she ever restart with her true passion? And the most important: will she ever make her own decisions?

This book turned out more differently than I thought. With that I mean that there actually was a really small part in Italy but more about that later. First the characters! Lucy created a lot of mystery around her in the first part of the book. Her friend kept talking about what she had to give up for this trip and that's when a reader starts thinking! Who is she really? The first part we only saw a girl eager on adventure and getting lost in new cities. Something I could really relate with and therefore this character was something good in the book. Later in the book we get to know what has happened to her and what she had to let go for a trip in Europe but that doesn't change the character that much. If I had to describe Lucy then I'd say she's a very dependent character. I can't go into much detail but let's say she's not so good at making her own decisions and she gets criticized for that. Because of that we do see how she reacts to it and if she'll grow into this or not.

Another character I'm dying to talk about is Charlene. First of all I'd like to complain about her because she was such a mean person! Absolutely so mean that I wanted to crawl into the plot and strangle her... that says enough doesn't it? However her rudeness could've been because Lucy and she have been looking at each other's faces for far too long. Which I can understand, when I went to Italy and came back I was glad that I could have some time apart and rest out. Whether she changed a bit and I could grow accustomed to her is something I'm going to leave in the dark and let you find out yourself! By the way, a quick note: it's not only Charlene I didn't like... but also Lucy's dad. Please find out for yourself what I'm talking about ;)



The person Lucy meets in Italy is something I'd love to keep a secret. The premise on the back doesn't say a lot about him so I think I shouldn't either. What I do want to tell is that that person is a lot more different that I would have thought and I really enjoyed that person's presence... 

Now the plot! As already mentioned it was a lot more differently than I had expected. Is that in a bad way? I don't really know. Even though it was different, I still enjoyed the book. My original plan was to find a book that was in Italy, this one was only a little part in Italy. That kind of disappointed me. I did see things in Florence, which was a good thing because I relived the atmosphere and I also loved Florence when I was there... but it was so fast paced! And that's really what made me feel more disappointed. So if you read the book to find the atmosphere of Italy, I wouldn't recommend it. It's too short for that.

Other than that the plot did give me a lot of feels and we all know how such books are: amazing! And it did surprise me multiple times which made up for the fact that the book didn't have a lot of Italy in it. The plot will change scènes a lot and with that Lucy will also grow in her behavior which I liked. And we'll know more and more towards the ending of who Lucy really is. With that I mean, we'll get the whole picture and not only a fragment. The ending was something predictable but the way things went is also something that is like a predictable movie and I don't know whether to like or or dislike it so I'll leave that in the middle.

This book was one that I did enjoy, even though it did disappoint me a bit because of the short, fast-paced bit in Italy. The characters were very open and you can easily relate with them, especially if you're someone who loves to get lost in a city and has a true passion for something. The plot has its surprises but it can also be predictable which will either leave you with a good feeling or a mixed feeling. But overall, it was a good book!

" When a person really loves something… or someone… You just have to stand back and let them.”   

Finding Audrey

Time for a new book review! Thanks to the Easter holidays I can read a lot so that means that I can review some more. The book I'm going to review this time is Finding Audrey by Sophie Kinsella. I've had this book in my hands a couple of times but it wasn't until I saw it in the library that I thought, let's just take it and read it.

Audrey has an anxiety disorder, she doesn't leave her house and doesn't put off her sunglasses. Her sunglasses make sure that the world around her keeps distance, it makes sure she doesn't need to make eye contact with people. If she has to do communicate with other people, she'll get very nervous, stressed out and scared. Her psychologist wants her to try and make more contact with the world she's scared of and for that Audrey needs to film. Film her life and soon film people she doesn't know all too well. It's then that she meets Linus, a friend of her brother. It's also very clear that he won't leave Audrey, he wants to help her. Together they try to take steps and make Audrey comfortable in a world she finds so terrifying. 

You might think it's really weird that I don't take it with me in the store but do take it with me in the library. Well, it does sound a little weird! It's just that I wasn't sure if I'd love this book so much that it was worth it to buy. I was doubting so that's why I decided against it, some weeks ago when I was going to walk out of the library it caught my attention. It's only lending so that's why I decided to try it out and see if I was wrong to doubt. 

But before I'll explain if I was wrong or not, I think it's appropriate to talk a little more about the characters! First of all Audrey! To be honest, she was a great character. I've read books before with people having some sort of disorder yet I found this one a lot more interesting. If that's the right way to put it... It's just that this was something more relatable to my opinion. Also because the psychologist was involved and the book is really concentrated on her disorder and not about the world around her and new adventures. That's also what makes this book a lot more different from other books. 

Now back to Audrey. As I already said in the short synopsis, Audrey hides herself behind her sunglasses and tries to stay inside a lot. It's very clear in the beginning that she's suffering from this disorder and that she's also very fragile. But we will see a big development in this character, she's starting to open up to strange people, in particular to Linus. Ever since that moment a lot of changes come with Audrey, she'll dare to take a step outside of her comfortzone. She will be growing stronger and more sure of herself but her sunglasses are something that she keeps close. 

Also at some point in the book you see that she's getting ahead of herself but only to show others that she can really do it. This kind of bothered me a little because all people who said she was still fragile, were wrong in her point of view. Of course we can also see this as something positive, that she wants to get through it by thinking positive but I didn't see it like that. But Audrey is a character who you could really relate to which is something great since she's the main character!

The second character that I'll discuss is Linus since also he is a very important person in this book. First of all maybe what his relationship is with this family: Linus is a friend of Audrey's younger brother Frank. Now we understand this we can go on with Linus. He's important because he wants to help Audrey. He wants her to heal and not to have this disorder any longer. The way he tries to help her is very personal and very beautiful, in my opinion. Their first meetup wasn't the best one and Linus really felt guilty, that's why they start writing little notes to each other and that way they start communicating. Ever since that moment Linus wants to be involved with the process she's making. I really enjoyed the presence of Linus because it was nice to see how much he wanted to help and also to see how he was trying to help. It all starts really innocent though... 

Two other characters that I need to discuss are Audrey's mother and Frank. These two characters... they're hilarious! Because Audrey stays home, Audrey's mom took some time off from her work. Now she's kind of bored at home and she reads the Daily Mail, she's obsessed with it and she believes everything that's in it. This causes her mother to take things way to serious and this makes her also go crazy! So crazy she'll work it out on her son Frank. 

Frank does not like this at all. He's a gamer and wants to join the championship of LOC (this is the game he plays). His mother read that gaming was bad and that it'd make someone more dumb, etc so now she keeps checking on Frank: is he gaming? How much does he game? Is he gaming again? And so on but this causes tension between the two and make sure they have many fights. His mom just goes crazy at a certain moment, I'm telling you guys you'll laugh so hard! This craziness and humor makes sure that the topic of the book comes a lot easier and is also a lot lighter to read. The humor therefore is a very important aspect.

Which brings me to the story line as already mentioned Audrey needs to film her life and interview other people. She's walking around almost constantly with the camera, and when she wants to film... it can be on a very inappropriate time. What I mean with this is that Audrey starts filming when her parents are having a rather more awkward-for-the-daughter conversation. And she has a lot of these moments which make it funny to read this. And so there are many more elements that I could tell to convince you this book is really funny! 

Next to humor there are also other feels that come around such as: fierceness, frustration, love and hate. Let me explain the latter! Audrey won't tell us what has happened that caused her to get this disorder, she only tells us that she doesn't go outside anymore. This means that she doesn't meet up with friends anymore and somewhere in the story we do get to see a friend again. She's just a little naive and thought Audrey has something far more worse going on. This causes me to hate her a little because she thinks that this isn't all too bad. I live up with the emotions that Audrey is sending us. This is however a great asset to this story! It really pulls you in and you feel what the character feels. 

Something else that needs to be told for the plot is that it will show you how Audrey gets stronger, how she has a relapse and gets all anxious again. The book just represents a rather more realistic version of how someone's proces goes: ups and downs. That's also what I really liked in this story, the realistic perspective. 

Now the creative part in this book because there are a bunch of them! First of all, Audrey often takes time to really talk to the person who's reading this. She will assume things of you, she will tell things to you "personally", she will say things but also hide things because she thinks it's not important to tell. I really enjoyed this, I've never read a book where a character directs itself to the reader so this was really refreshing. 

The second creative thing in this book was that some conversations of her filming will be told in a screenplay kinda way and I liked that aspect too. And the last thing worth mentioning is probably the fact that the little notes send between her and Linus are really presented as notes in the book. So I was really surprised by this! I absolutely adore the cover, it's the first thing that pulled me to this story but really reading it and seeing more creative things really make this a great book! 

Now my verdict? I'm not disappointed that I didn't buy the book myself. Sure it was a great book with great characters! It has a good plot that's realistic but will be lightning the mood by its humor and other feels and has a very nice lay-out. But I don't regret not buying it because it isn't going to compete with the books I wanted more badly. That doesn't mean I didn't like reading this book! I absolutely loved this book and I do recommend it! If I did buy it, I wouldn't have been disappointed at all! So if you were doubting too, go check out a library and pick it up! Or go buy a copy, whatever you prefer! I'm pretty sure you'll also sink into this story of Audrey trying to find Audrey! I hope you guys enjoy is as much as I did!

"It won't be forever. You'll be in the dark for as long as it takes and then you'll come out."

TBR of February

January has been a very productive month! I've read some more than in other months and that's a good thing! Sadly, I didn't read one of my TBR books I wanted to read in January: Bloodlines. So that book also comes in my TBR of the month! Also there's another Book Challenge which you can find: here 

Shadows by Paula Weston
The first book I want to talk about is Shadows by Paula Weston. I've had my eyes on this book for a while because I hope it's about angels. I think we've established it by now: I'm an Angel VS. Demon girl, I can't live without my flying creatures... 

Yet I feel like I already have read most of the good series about Angels and Demons! So I didn't want to start this series until I finished the series by Susan EE (Penryn and the end of days series). One angel-alike series at a time, Erica... 
So Yes, I can finally start this book and I hope it'll be as good as I have imagined and heard of. It has really good scores on Goodreads: a 4 out of 5 stars! 

It's about a girl who has lost her twin brother and tries to get closure but then... there comes a boy she's been dreaming of since that one tragic day, and he doesn't leave her life untouched. For a matter of fact, he turns her whole world, build on what was for her the truth, upside down. He ruins all for her by telling things about her brother and about herself. She doesn't know what to believe while she get's thrown in a whole new world. 

Doesn't that sound exciting? I'm also very curious to the author's writing style because I've never read any book by her. I did hear great things about her so yeah, I can't wait to dive in! 

Also if anybody has series about Angels, please, please leave it in the comments or contact me. I'm in need of more series about flying people that look beautifully unreal! 

GOODREADS

“Most stories are based on something real.” 

Did I Mention I Love You? by Estelle Maskame

Another new author for me is Estelle Maskame. I came across this books while I was, as usual, checking out some books that I maybe wanted to read. And then I saw this, look. at. that. cover! Just look at it! It looks beautiful and so promising! But the plot does look good too...

The main female character goes spend the summer with her father and new family. Which means getting to know her 3 new step-brothers! And that doesn't really goes as planned. One of them has the biggest ego she's ever seen and speaking of an irritated mood... His friends show our female character around while he only tries to avoid her. What's his problem? And how does our female character feel about it? 

These questions hopefully will be answered in this book! I can't wait really, it seems such a feels-book and this cover. God, I just can't wait! I just... NEED! It's also a trilogy so I'm expecting a lot of feels and maybe even an open end. I'm really curious to where this book might lead. 

GOODREADS

"Who the hell is this jackass?"

Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins 
A while ago I read the first book in this trilogy, for the first time. So It's really time for me to read the second book in this series! I'm always curious to what similarities I'm going to find but also which differences in comparison with the film!

There isn't really much more to tell about this book because I'm pretty sure, we all know what this is about!  

GOODREADS

“I wish I could freeze this moment, right here, right now and live in it forever.” 

And that ladies and gentleman, is my TBR-list for February! But I'm not so sure if I'll be able to follow this one because there are exciting releases coming this month! Such as THE POWER by Jennifer L. Armentrout and GLASS SWORD by Victoria Aveyard. Those are two books, I'm personally even more excited about because the first ones in these series were both SO, SO good! Are there any releases you guys are excited for?

The Destiny of Violet and Luke

This one is a book that is in a series I've already talked about! The coincidence series by Jessica Sorensen! I talked about the first book in this series some weeks ago which was The coincidence of Callie and Kayden. One book later in this series (#3), we get this pretty one: The Destiny of Violet and Luke by Jessica Sorensen!

Luke Price is known as a real womanizer, from one women he goes to another. He might be tough on the outside but there's so much more to him. He wants control, he needs order and what he wishes the most are distractions. Those are the only things that can mute the memories of his childhood. He no longer has the need to remember that period of his life, but the past always haunts you down...


Violet Hayes life is a mess. Entangled in drugs affairs and neglect, she only has nightmares. Violet grew up in many foster homes while being haunted by her parents' unsolved murders. She needs closure but there is none and the wound just keeps getting ripped open. To survive in this awful world, she doesn't allow herself to feel anything and has to keep distance from everyone... 

Both teenagers find each other and instantly hate each other, yet they can't seem to stay away from one another. There is no way of fighting destiny, and both start to open up and feel things they've never felt before. Never wanted to feel before or even allowed. Together they try to find a way and discover how similar they really are. But what one must never forget is that the past always haunts you down... 

I enjoyed this story as much as I enjoyed The Coincidence by Callie and Kayden, but these two aren't really comparable to each other... yet Jessica Sorensen did it again! This book was so stunning and so deep that I just kept reading! 

The first things I heard about this trilogy about Violet and Luke was that I'd hate reading it because of Luke. It was just the same criticism as I said in the other review, but from what I also read on the back of the book I first wasn't convinced I'd want to read this. Yet as every other book I check out and aren't that convinced about... it comes back. It haunts me and then I decide to give it a chance anyway. And I'm glad I gave this a chance because it was so worth it! 

As I said this was really different to The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden and we already get to see that in the way the characters behave. The main female character, Violet, isn't anything like Callie. Callie was the silent one, introverted but Violet is... hateful. She hates everything, she is irritated very easily. What I liked most about Violet was the fact that because of all that, she stood up for herself. She bites (back). 

We know she has had a very bad childhood, both her parents were murdered and we really see how she acts because of that, what insecurities she hides behind her irritation. But from the start, I was convinced that she wasn't all about that tough love. Throughout the story we get to know the real Violet and I was happy that we could see that transformation and how she has changed.

As for Luke, he's the arrogant one. The bastard, I'd say in comparison with Kyle. Kyle is the team player, Luke needs his control. I was really curious to what has happened in his childhood that made him the man he is now. There was just something about Luke that I couldn't shake. I just had the need to find out how he really acts and if he's really been behaving like this for his whole life. But also Luke has his secrets, which got me more curious.

The good thing was that we already have seen sides from Luke in the Coincidence of Callie and Kayden, so that added more to my curiosity! I can say that I did like him from the start, whereas with Violet I wasn't all too sure but she grew on me eventually.  

When both collided with each other, I was so amused. The way they act with each other, how they react and such is just too amusing! I did got that both of them were really irritated by each other and were hateful. That part really shows that both need control and order but also distance from other people. They don't want to get burned a second time. You really see their characteristics in action and that's what I loved most in this book. 

Then the plot, it was not how I thought it would be. Many warn you because Luke is a womanizer and that this will have bad influences on the language and how this book would develop but again, I didn't find anything of that leading to a bad book. 

On the contrary, this book really kept your attention. And I think this statement was perfect with this book: 'Opposites attract each other'. There's a constant pushing and pulling, distance and longing and that kept this plot really exciting. Who is going to give in first? How is the other one going to react on this? Many questions arise but all do get answered. 

I just enjoyed this book so much because both characters are so different from what I expected them to be but also from the books I've read so far. I've never had a book where two could dislike and like each other so much that it might end well or end badly. That was another thing that I was really astonished about, would there be a good ending? A happy ending? Sometimes it leads to that, but others times you aren't that convinced anymore. It's another factor that really kept me reading along! 

And for the ending... It was VERY surprising but you'll have to read for yourself. But the whole plot isn't as realistic to me as the story of Callie and Kayden was. It's still something you can connect with, and still very rational but I found Callie and Kayden just a bit more 'normal'. That doesn't make this book bad of course, it's just a little thing I thought!

As I already said before: Jessica Sorensen did it again! I'm glad I gave this book a shot and didn't let it go because I got scared off by the bad comments on this book. If you read The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden and want to read more by Jessica Sorensen but still something totally opposite? This is your book! 

A little remark, if you don't want to read the Coincidence of Callie and Kayden, you can start this book and only read the story of Violet and Luke. If you do want to read Callie and Kayden's story, I recommend you reading it in the order that Goodreads gives you which you can find HERE. I only say this because if you don't read them all in the order like I did, you get spoiled! I just read the trilogy of Callie and Kayden first and then the trilogy of Violet and Luke, and I got spoiled big time! This is because the stories are woven together and the characters are seen in the other stories during this series of 7 books! So watch out for the spoilers!

“Even though the odds are in my favor, doesn’t mean they’ll end up that way. First rule of cards. And of life.” 

My Heart and Other Black Holes

On Christmas Eve, I finally started My Heart and Other Black Holes by Jasmine Warga. I received the book 2 weeks ago when I finished my exams. I had to put him on hold because I was reading in another book I wanted to finish first. On Goodreads there are mostly good things written about it which made sure the expectation started to grow with each review I read. This book met all of those expectations... It was even better than what I imagined or dared to dream. It's also why I'll be writing a non-spoiler review and a spoiler review. It's written so well and stunning, emotional even. And for once I really want to spill the beans so that's why there is a spoiler review for the ones that already read the book. If you DIDN'T read the book, please DON'T spoil it for yourself! You'll regret it. Do me this favor, if you haven't read the book, only read the non-spoiler review and go pick up that book. As for the ones that did read the book, you don't need to read the non-spoiler review because I'll say everything that's in there, also in the spoiler review. 
Merry (1 day late) Christmas to you all!

Aysel loves physics. She loves to know things about it, she'd love to know how it'll explain what happens to energy when someone dies. More specifically, when she dies. Ever since the crime her father committed, her mother can't look at her without being reminded and everybody on school is talking about it. Everybody simply keeps reminding her what happened, what her father did.

It only makes her question her life and if she doesn't cause any problems to her mother. If she isn't a danger, like her father. Is it growing inside of her? Will she become the same monster? She wants to spare everybody on earth and to make that happen she needs to die. 
She can't do it on her own, she's scared she'll back out when it'll happen so she goes on a site where she finds a suicide partner: FrozenRobot aka Roman. The boy has faced his own problem and is drowning in guilt. Also he thinks he needs to die. Both teenagers are in their own depression, both teenagers decide to do it together, they'll get each other to an end. The End. 

You'd think from what you read that this is going to be some hard, dark stuff to read but actually it isn't that hard as you think. It's very light written en really captures every part of the thoughts that might go through a teen's head when he or she is suicidal. 

Both main characters want to die and find each other on a site. This story was written so beautifully and stunning it was hard to stop reading. Especially because the two characters each have their own problem that makes them suicidal. I had a lot of questions because the 'why' isn't fully explained until further in the book. I was fond of the mystery around the sad characters, they kept their family in the dark but also the reader.

Aysel's reason will be explained very late in the book. Of course you get aspects and clues to why she wants to die but what happened to make her think this way stays a mystery for later in the book. I was really fond of this character because of the way she was. You'd think she'd be sad all the time, boring and dreadful but it wasn't like that. She'd say stupid jokes and ask stupid questions that did give you a smile on your face, she'd see things a little bit brighter and that's why I really liked her. Naturally she'll have moments in the book where she's really sad and doesn't understand the universe. 

She's also a physics geek and whenever she gets the chance to daydream a little, she'll use science questions to keep her busy. As for her family, they try. She doesn't experience it but during the book some characters really make an effort and tell her that they really are trying but that she's just too blind to see. 

As for Roman's family, they're really nice. His mother is very happy but also very protective. She wants to make everybody feel as if they're at home. He's a little bothered about it some times and so is Aysel. Roman is a character that in the beginning made me have a lot of questions. When the characters meet, he seems very handsome, he has friends that walk around him. He seems to have a good life. I guess that's what the author was trying to make us see, that in reality the person just let's you see what you want to see but deep down is actually all broken. 

What I was really fond of in this story is their connections. In the beginning they're each very distant, they get mad or irritated. But later in the book they get closer and I really liked that in this story. That if it's going to be the end, you don't need to be alone. You can try and find someone. I really loved the way their relationship grew into a friendship while each of them needs to face their own inner demons. One of the characters eventually does face them because of the other's unspoken words.

The author also left a note at the end of the book:
"To me, My Heart and Other Black Holes has always been a story about the people who understand you, all of you, even the scariest and weirdest parts of you. It's about those people who come into your life when you least expect it, in the strangest of ways, and change everything--it is about the importance of letting those people in, of opening up to them. It is about the people in your life who help you to see yourself differently and the true power of human connection."


This part of the author's note was something that I found in the story too. She illustrated it beautifully in the book and when you read the author's note, you know exactly what she's talking about and see the moment back in front of you. I also thought you could easily imagine the story since it's a topic that's very accurate in this generation.

This book was well written, was fluent and very emotional but also very realistic. My expectations have all been met and then it was still better than what I could've ever imagined. I recommend this book not only because of how moving it is but also because it's a problem very nowadays and it gives you perspective on it, in some way. Did you read any other books by Jasmine Wanga that you'd recommend? Leave a comment or message me!

“I will be stronger than my sadness.” 

Aysel loves physics. She loves to know things about it, she'd love to know how it'll explain what happens to energy when someone dies. More specifically, when she dies. Ever since the crime her father committed, her mother can't look at her without being reminded and everybody on school is talking about it. Everybody simply keeps reminding her what happened, what her father did.
It only makes her question her life and if she doesn't cause any problems to her mother. If she isn't a danger, like her father. Is it growing inside of her? Will she become the same monster? She wants to spare everybody on earth and to make that happen she needs to die. 
She can't do it on her own, she's scared she'll back out when it'll happen so she goes on a site where she finds a suicide partner: FrozenRobot aka Roman. The boy has faced his own problem and is drowning in guilt. Also he thinks he needs to die.  Both teenagers are in their own depression, both teenagers decide to do it together, they'll get each other to an end. The End. 

You'd think from what you read that this is going to be some hard, dark stuff to read but actually it isn't that hard as you think. It's very light written en really captures every part of the thoughts that might go through a teen's head when he or she is suicidal. 

Both main characters want to die and find each other on a site. This story was written so beautifully and stunning it was hard to stop reading. Especially because the two characters each have their own problem that makes them suicidal. I had a lot of questions because the 'why' isn't fully explained until further in the book. For example, Aysel's father did something really bad because he's in prison right? But I just kept asking myself why that'd be something to kill herself for. What did he do? How did he do it? And how affected her that? Of course later on we get to know that her father was acting strange and then murdered someone. She just felt like she'd become something like him, a monster and do monstrous things. I was fond of the mystery around the sad characters with their own reasons, they kept their family in the dark but also the reader.

I was really fond of Aysel because of the way she was. You'd think she'd be sad all the time, boring and dreadful but it wasn't like that. She'd say stupid jokes and ask stupid questions that did give you a smile on your face, she'd see things a little bit brighter and that's why I really liked her. Naturally she'll have moments in the book where she's really sad and doesn't understand the universe. Then she starts talking about something black inside of her that takes away every feeling she has and when she said those things, it was explained so well that you were moved by it. I wished she didn't have to feel this way.

She's also a physics geek and whenever she gets the chance to daydream a little, she'll use science questions to keep her busy. As for her family, they try. She doesn't experience it but during the book some characters really make an effort and tell her that they really are trying but that she's just too blind to see. At the end she also confronted her mother, she wanted to see her dad. Aysel shared a part of her that she never wanted to say out loud and all because of Roman. That guy, I knew it from the start, was the one that'd keep her from doing the stupidest thing of her life.

As for Roman's family, they're really nice. His mother is very happy but also very protective. She wants to make everybody feel as if they're at home. He's a little bothered about it some times and so is Aysel. Roman is a character that in the beginning made me have a lot of questions. When the characters meet, he seems very handsome, he has friends that walk around him. He seems to have a good life. I guess that's what the author was trying to make us see, that in reality the person just let's you see what you want to see but deep down is actually all broken. And he is all broken, he feels guilty for what happened to his sister and is so determined to die and leave this earth because he doesn't deserve more. My heart ached for him! So many feelings and thoughts were in my mind and I wished he just didn't think like that! 

What I was really fond of in this story is their connections. In the beginning they're each very distant, they get mad or irritated. But later in the book they get closer and I really liked that in this story. That if it's going to be the end, you don't need to be alone. You can try and find someone. I really loved the way their relationship grew into a friendship while each of them needs to face their own inner demons. Aysel eventually does face them because of the Roman's unspoken words. Love saved them both! I mean those moments where Roman reached out for Aysel, they were fantastic! I was so happy in that moment and was so eager to see more of it. And the moment where they were camping, that whole part... it made me smile so much! It was fantastic and I loved their connection! 

The ending was the most moving in my point of view. I knew things were going to change, I knew one of them would flake out. But then I also knew that Roman knew and now he'd do something stupid on his own. I remember seeing the date about the chapter "Thursday, April 4" and I knew it, that's the day he'd do something stupid. 

I was surprised that he used a car though, but my heart was racing very hard when she was trying to find him. I just kept praying he wouldn't die and that this book wasn't going to end with someone dying. The ending... you'd think the ending would've been really their end. It wasn't, thank God!

The author also left a note at the end of the book:
"To me, My Heart and Other Black Holes has always been a story about the people who understand you, all of you, even the scariest and weirdest parts of you. It's about those people who come into your life when you least expect it, in the strangest of ways, and change everything--it is about the importance of letting those people in, of opening up to them. It is about the people in your life who help you to see yourself differently and the true power of human connection."



This part of the author's note was something that I find in the story too. She illustrated it beautifully in the book and when you read the author's note, you know exactly what she's talking about and see the moment back. They understand each others sadness. 
Roman is the one that changes everything for Aysel because of his drawing. And can I say that that was absolutely cute? She let him in and she saw that it could be different. That they could fix each other and you could really feel that with each page you turned, they were fixing each other.

I found it very moving and was very pleased by that! I also thought you could easily imagine the story since it's a topic that's very accurate in this generation.

This book was well written, was fluent and very emotional but also very realistic. My expectations have all been met and then it was still better than what I could've ever imagined. I recommend this book not only because of how moving it is but also because it's a problem very nowadays and it gives you perspective on it, in some way. Did you read any other books by Jasmine Wanga that you'd recommend? Leave a comment or message me!

“I will be stronger than my sadness.”